Dog's Dinner by Foxymoron

We had a poor auction on one board this week, and I think the blame was entirely mine. The auction was a bit of a dog's dinner. A little research shows that this phrase arose a few years after the similar expression "pig's ear". It first appears in T.F. Benson’s 1902 novel Scarlet and Hyssop, in which a character compares a jumble of leftovers to a “dog’s dinner.” D. W. Barrett’s Life & Work among Navvies, 1880, uses the other expression: “Now, Jack, I’m goin’ to get a tiddley wink of pig’s ear.” But that is just the Cockney rhyming slang for beer and does not indicate something messed up. It is not clear how it came to get its modern meaning.

Our auction was unconvincing: My partner's 1NT as dealer was 15-17 and was pushy - the KR evaluation is only 13.5, despite the three tens. We continued, uncontested, 2D-2H-3C-3NT. I should now bid 4C, shaping out. East's fitting rounded suit cards will help us reach slam, with East bidding 4D and West bidding 6C. Instead I bid 4NT, invitational, and East was quick to put down a green card. With the clubs behaving, 12 tricks rolled in, but 6NT is slightly against the odds needing the clubs to come in and a 12th trick in one of the majors. I feared reaching the dreaded 5C (fatal at matchpoints), but that was my excuse for a poor auction. The advantage of playing in clubs may well be that you can ruff out the hearts. Even when partner has Kxx in clubs you may just be able to ruff two hearts in East. On this hand everything works. I was surprised to get above average for 4NT+2.

So a dog's dinner, which reminds me of my neighbour's dog being unwell. When I asked him how he was feeling that day, he replied "Rough".