The Albatross by Foxymoron

Often, to amuse themselves, the men of a crew

Catch albatrosses, those vast sea birds

That indolently follow a ship

As it glides over the deep, briny sea.

Three under par in golf is known as an Albatross. The expression seems to go back to 1929, in a match between Durham and Hartlepool. "One certainly didn’t hear of any ‘albatrosses’ or even ‘eagles’ but certainly some ‘birdies’ were achieved." was the report. Of course, in bridge, -3 is not usually a good score (unless a save at favourable vulnerability), and is well below par. 

My result on this hand was an "albatross around my neck", an expression that stems from The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, and prevented Stefanie and me from doing better in the recent SIMs. It was close to a nationwide bottom, but I had no regrets.

We reached 4S by North after the auction (Pass)-Pass-(1H)-1S-(2H)-2S-(Pass)-4S-(All Pass). East led his singleton diamond and I had to decide on the play. The opening bid by West strongly suggested to me that he had the king of spades and a losing spade finesse would surely lead to a diamond ruff. I decided to play ace and another spade but East won, played a heart to the ace and had a diamond ruff anyway so I only made 10 tricks. Of course, taking the spade finesse would have made all 13 tricks, six diamonds, six spades and an ace. My result was therefore "three under par", an Albatross, and the seven pairs that notched up +510 were no doubt mocking me.